Moth Work

After years of grant writing and research, next week I actually start the work I've been planning. It feels good to finally be able to start to realize the vision. In between lesson plans, I am working on an installation I'll be doing in June. I'll be working with moth imagery, so yesterday I had a fun time making a moth stencil and playing with it. I don't know how many times I've gotten into the zone working on an art project and listening to Vinyl Tap on CBC radio, but it is a sweet place to be. I've been working all morning and now I feel like I want to get out of the house, but since we are surrounded by a cushion of snow, it's going to be hard to get motivated. I'd rather just sit on the couch reading a mystery and eating raspberry marshmallows from Sweet Obsession.

Tulips and Chai

Ules has been busy making Lego gadgets. He has just discovered Gilligan's Island and is at that age when he laughs uproariously at all the sight gags and pratfalls. I happen to have a copy of The Gilligan's Island Cookbook, so I see a coconut cream pie in our future. He has also chosen a tropical island theme for his birthday well ahead of time. Yesterday I bought some white hot chocolate mix and made chai with it with whole spices and green rooibus tea. I used real cinnamon and topped it with whipped cream. The result was decadent, but too sweet for me.

I have to avoid dark chocolate again because I've entered a migraine zone. I saw bright sun dogs on Sunday and my heart sank because I know what that means: a change in atmospheric pressure and migraine weather. Sure enough, Monday was full on migraine day and Tuesday morning was excrutiating. I kept trying to visualize relaxing my head, neck, and shoulders. I've got lots of heavy duty meetings this week so I've got to try to keep the stress under control. Sunny and bright today and it's dropping in temperature. I wonder if we will get some more snow. Anyway. the best thing about a migraine is when it's over. Like my dad always says, "I think I'm gonna live."

Valentine's Post Card

Happy belated Valentine's Day. Hope you had a good one. We need that shot of red and pink colour therapy at this time of the year and lots of chocolate therapy as well. I decided to thaw some tayberries we had picked last year, just after Canada Day. It was a good occasion to celebrate the gutsy flavor of this cross between raspberries and blackberries. I bought some Avalon cream and added it to a pulp I made by simmering the berries until soft and them putting them through the moule. This takes out some of the seeds. I added a bit of wildflower honey, cooled the mixture and then added the cream. I put it in the Donvier, but realized it hadn't been in the freezer long enough to do its magic, so I had to make ice cream the old fashioned way by putting the mix in a metal pan and then stirring it up with a fork after each freeze. It was tedious, but we pulled through. I heated up some of Wendy Boys' chocolate raspberry sauce to drizzle on top. It was bloody gorgeous. We had ribs with BBQ sauce, rice, and a funky Waldorf salad I made withe red cabbage, apples and walnuts, all from local farms. I also picked up some paté from Benton Brothers on Cambie and discovered that they make good sandwiches there too.

The Pain Diaries

This week the kids in my son's class had a bake sale for an orphanage in Guatemala called Project Somos. I was thrilled at how well they did, raising $280 dollars. I was hoping that since I've been doing some baking with them they would be keen to bake at home and I was pleased that most of the items were home made. I don't understand why you would bring store bought sweets to a bake sale, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

I love that one of the kids brought mango pudding squares because he loves them. The kids gobbled them up and they were gone in no time.

I also loved that this was a "coming of age" ritual for these students. They've always been the little kids lined up for the goodies and this was the first time they were in charge. They also learned lessons about deferred pleasure as they had to wait for the whole school to purchase their items before they joined the line.

Valentine's Day is a great time to take on this kind of a project, marking the day as one of caring for each other on a global scale, and celebrating peace and compassionate citizenship.

Speaking of compassion, I have been thinking about pain recently. I heard a documentary about a singer that I used to follow whose career has been interrupted for several years because of chronic and debilitating pain. I also heard a doctor who specializes in pain say that medicine is very far behind in the treatment of pain as a disorder and a pathology of its own. He was very proactive on the ethics of treating people in pain with dignity and said that doctors have an ethical responsibility to help people who are suffering.

I get dragged down because I have developed chronic back pain that is affecting my mobility as I age. Once in a while I get a wake up call that I have to do something about it, but my doctor has never really offered me any help with it. I had a set back when my massage therapist moved away from Vancouver. So it's back to the drawing board. Now that my migraine pain is tamed down, I need to focus on fixing my back again. One gets used to living with a certain level of pain and copes with it, thinking that there's not much you can do about it.

Pain affects your personality and identity. Some days it makes me very cynical and irritable, but on the whole I think my experiences with pain have helped me to develop a sense of empathy. I know how much energy and attention the pain dragon takes out of your day. My massage therapist told me I was "a fighter," which is another thing that develops from the struggle with pain. Not many people really understand just how much my body hurts until they work with me on the massage table. Pain demands a kind of respect. Having this physical weakness also makes me a vulnerable person and keeps me humble. Sometimes I am too tired to fight and so I just shut down as a survival mechanism. Most days I work around the pain, but I know that I'm going to have to dive right in there soon and face the dragon again.

Looking Forward to Le Lapin

One of the bloggers I follow (Elizabeth Abernathy) has decided to focus on at least three things she is looking forward to each month. C'est une bonne idée. This month I am looking forward to:

1) a good excuse to eat lots of chocolate around Valentine's Day

I found this Sesame Bianco at Cocoa Nymph and fell in love so I've been experimenting with making my own version of sesame bark at home.

2) getting all the prep work done for the workshops I'm giving this spring

3) ordering all my seeds

4) checking on the bees to see how they did over the winter

5) visiting VanDusen at least once a week to do research and see what is blooming as spring approaches

6) doing a creative garden journal workshop on Feb 23 at 6:30 pm at Ruby Dog's Art Emporium

7) the bake sale my son's class is having

8) making baklava

Well there you go, that's a good start. What are you looking forward to this month?